My first impressions of people are generally quite accurate. I can easily tell if I will get along with a person or not, and I tend to categorize people in varying ways. Top Tier would be people I could be alone with in an elevator for 7 days and not want to kill myself. The next tier down is where I could mingle in a party with them just fine, but a friendship beyond that is like asking me to snuggle with a dwarf. The next few tiers are along the lines of accepting friend requests on Facebook as long as it remains there, to the very bottom of me wanting nothing to do with that person for as long as I live.
There has been on occasion the pleasant surprise where I misjudged an individual. I think for a lot of people in the film industry have their lists of people they wouldn’t work with for any amount of money in the world. Honestly, any amount of money in the world can potentially make me like the biggest SOB in the country, but there are those rare exceptions. I guess this “list” we sometimes create in our minds can be a handy tool, if not for the fact that sometimes our perceptions of people are a little off.
I had an experience last year where I worked with someone in the industry and I felt they were a little misguided. We disagreed on a few issues but that isn’t anything abnormal- especially for those in an industry where creativity usually dominates over the ability to perform the basics of human function, such as speaking. Perhaps that’s why listening to a brilliantly creative mind talk is like watching them trip over their own words and thoughts.
To top things all off with my experiences with this person, was also listening to other people’s opinions, perceptions, and work experiences about them that didn’t paint them in the best of lights. A shocking discovery for myself was how our two worlds collided and being forced in some twisted manner to overcome our issues in order to work with one another again. Sure enough, actually talking with the person cleared up a lot of my hesitation. Needless to say, this person moved up a few tiers.
I was wrong. I am always happy to admit I was wrong (that is if you can prove it!!)
The point of which I am trying to make is to describe one person in particular. This person and I have had a very long, if not a tumultuous relationship since our first encounter way back in the 90’s when we were both in High School. I met the poor guy in drama class and it’s always managed to seem that even way back then we would clash on a variety of things. Politics is a perfect example. At any rate, throughout our journey’s of high school debauchery, we remained pretty close friends.
And then it ended. Suddenly. Over a girl.
Over the next few years, our paths would once again cross, even for just a moment of passing on the street or at a movie theater, and after a few exchanges of the casual and cordial chatter we would part ways. We went on with our lives, until we would pass each other again.
The problem was, was that our next chance meeting took place in some grungy and cold back alley. He was a wreck, for the lack of a better term (and to allow him to keep his dignity), and I couldn’t help but be stricken with grief over the shell of a human being he had become. I couldn’t get him out of mind. I remembered back to the our high school days and the fun we used to have, but more importantly I remembered a few of his career aspirations (one of them was to be President of the United States) and considered helping him while he helped me.
The result was a creative project that even today I am quite proud of despite its many problems.
From that point on, our paths would cross more frequently, although it was still back in the alley. One such encounter wasn’t by chance at all, but merely with a goal in mind: I offered the poor schmuck an opportunity to which he gleefully accepted. Never in my life had I witnessed the sudden change of a person. Within the next year the shell of the man I once saw was gone and he had become something else entirely.
I often ponder about that chance encounter that occurred 5 years ago. How I initially despised the guy but always managed to be friendly when bumping into him. What was it that compelled me to once again befriend him when he sat on my bottom tier for many years? Could it be that I had misjudged him and that I was wrong for thinking such? Was it or wasn’t it an act of God? What force of nature convinced me to betray my own personal, judgmental mind and give him a second chance?
All questions cannot be answered but I can’t help but to continue searching for the answers anyway. All I know is that here I am, past the point of bedtime, writing a brief history about the closest friend I’ve ever had. And we still disagree on politics.
Good night, friend.
